MONTH #7 continued...

Marriage Epiphany
Can you change the past by changing the future?
Even though the past is written in stone, and while sometimes the future can also seem unchangeable - it's not. The present can seem like a prison sentence - that you will be stuck in whatever path you're heading, but it doesn't have to be like that.
It will take work. I'm trying to get on board with this theory. After a month of "soul searching" and trying to problem-solve the problems in my mind, the past is the aspect of my marriage that is getting me down the most and leading our present circumstances to feel like a life sentence.
I am grasping at straws to find a way to get out of this rut. I can't just decide to be happy because that's just masking my emotions and they will certainly come back with a vengeance if I do not deal with them now. That's why it has taken me so long to get over this. I'm searching for a cure, not a treatment.
I'm starting to believe that if we can do things now to change our lives and get us on a new path, then that can help soothe the pain of the past.
My husband hasn't had the greatest of career paths in the past 4 years since he graduated college. So while he can't go back and get a different first job out of college that wasn't sales or have a different major that he would like to be using now vs. the one he's got that he can no longer use or want to use, by going back and getting an MBA in business/finance - can he change the future, stop the present from continuing by getting out of the unreliability of sales and into the finance field where he will be happier and hopefully more successful?
I've been regretting leaving Drum Corps International over 3 years ago now to get into the agency life, which now bores me. Money was 90% of the reason I left what was the best job I've had and what I'm realizing is what I really want to be doing with my life. But now my yellow pages/direct mail agency experience outweighs my event promotions and marketing experience from DCI, making it more and more difficult to get back into that field. However, in the past few months I've been volunteering for PACT Humane Society - doing grunt work of cleaning kitty cages :) nothing glamorous, but enjoyable nonetheless. Well, the management of the PACT Humane Society recently took notice of me and my professional qualities and officially as of yesterday I am now the Volunteer Coordinator for the Barrington Rd PetSmart. This is an all-volunteer organization so there will never be a job prospect out of this, but for now it is something on the side I can use my professional talents towards and be passionate about. And who knows, maybe someday I'll have this listed on my resume and it will be my ticket into the career I want!

So that was a long-winded update, but with these recent changes & plans, I'm trying to look at it that way. That instead of getting depressed over the past, I should be proactive and learn from the mistakes and find ways to make the future even better - instead of rolling over and allowing the past to have beaten me.